Battered

The waves crash me and bound me

Slap me and crown me

In flickers of glorious shame

I hate what I do and I hate who I am

And bulimia is all I can blame

But who is this monster inside me

That’s beginning to finally define me

It tears me up with humiliating sins

I fear it will defeat the fight I put out

But despite this I know it won’t win

On my knees I’m now begging for freedom

Because my arm’s scarred from knives lesions

I don’t want my skin to be mine anymore

My illness suffocates the person I am

Each day feels like I’m fighting it raw

I feel allergic to my very own thoughts

They make me ill and my mind feels taut

It destroys any dignity remaining intact

Thus I try to pretend I’m not me anymore

But I can’t forever hide behind deceptive acts

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2 Responses to Battered

  1. eatnothingdoeverything says:

    I feel your pain… all too much

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